Dates to remember

Someone asked me the other day what the date was that I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I recall that the date of the first mammogram was on Saturday, September 27, 2008. The following Monday they called me to schedule a second mammogram because they found spots and/or lumps that did not look good. I don't recall what date I went back for the follow-up. As for the actual day I was "diagnosed", I would have to say I do not recall because it seemed like everyone I was talking to at the time, all the doctors anyways, refused to use the "C" word and I was actually the first person to utter the dreaded word itself.

The lumpectomy was performed December 4th(?) and the reduction was performed January 9. Other then that, the rest of the dates are kinda fuzzy. So, I guess the question of when I was diagnosed sparked my follow-up question of, "What is my 'anniversary' date? Do I celebrate being cancer-free? and if so, what date? Having awoken from my year long coma, so to speak, I don't know that I would want to remember most of it, but I feel a small urging in the pit of my tummy to celebrate something. I want to celebrate getting my life back and having much smaller boobs. Do I pick a date for that, and if so, what date do I pick?

It's a new one!

I read somewhere that almost half, if not more, of a group of people who were polled said that this past year was by far the worst year in a long time. With unemployment rates skyrocketing, homes being foreclosed in huge numbers and the economy tanking the way it did, it is a wonder anyone who did not formerly have billions in the bank survived to tell the tale.

As we ALL know, this past year for me was a bad year, medically speaking. Technically it all began in '08, but the vast majority of my medical issues consumed 2009. With that said, I am still thankful to be alive, glad I got the girls reduced and happy to have lost a few pounds. I am not happy about the whole hair thing, but it is saving me TONS on haircare and maintenance. (Yes folks, still riding that gravy train!)

I am happy to report I am starting the new year with a new phone and a temp gig that should last at least a day or two into the new year. It is always nice to go into a new year with a pending paycheck!

The bad news, or alternatively, the other shoe, is the fact that my mother is awaiting the results of her needle biopsy. They found a small lump in her breast and she had the biopsy on Wednesday. Because of the holiday, she will not have her results until Monday, at the earliest. The good news is that neither her mammogram nor her biopsy were so clearly definitive that performing the actual lab analysis were merely part of the protocol. In my case, even I could tell from the mammo and the biopsy results that my news was bad right away. The lump was obvious to a legally blind person on the mammogram and the lab tech told me that while healthy cells are pink and float, cancer cells are white and sink. I was immediately informed that I had, "...a lot of sinkers".

I had described in detail what they do for the "needle biopsy" (NEEDLE MY ASS) and how it was more like a rotorooter. Those who read the post regarding this whole nightmare are fully aware that this was a highly disturbing thing to endure. My mother said that my recitation of the facts and issues, in addition to a graphic description of the procedure, were spot on and she actually found herself chuckling through the procedure. The lab tech said my description of the thing as a rotorooter was the best she had heard.

Let's all be thankful we pulled out of the last year in reasonably good shape and keep my mom in your thoughts and prayers. NOONE should have to go through this.

Stuff and hairy arm pits

I can honestly say the ONLY thing I miss about the chemo was no shaving. I know, TMI! The funny thing is that when I actually looked in the mirror yesterday I realized that the patch of hair under the armpit on the side that underwent radiation is about the size of a golf ball, while the other side is 3 times as long and wide. It is like that armpit now extends down to my bra line. It also made me realize they had stretched the skin down when they did the reduction, but it is just another weird thing.

I now have a pan of lasagna in the freezer and it seems to have been done just in time. It is now 12:46pm and as of 10:45 they had changed the start time of my new project to 3:00pm today. Fortunately, Nikka (who lives next door) is working as well so we can ride in together. Misery loves it some company! I am not complaining that they keep changing the date and time, but the emotional yo-yo crap is tough on the spirit. Again, it is not confirmed but I may or may not be working for one weekend, this weekend, project to end on Sunday...who knows?!? All I do know is that will likely screw up my unemployment and I will wind up making less.

Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow! New tits!

Yes folks, I am home from the hospital. The surgeon told Amy it was NOT a truck that hit me, it was a train. The surprising part of this whole thing is that when I woke up, it was not the pain in my chest that was bothering me so much as it was the pain in my arms. Apparently, because they kept my arms taped out for hours while laying on the table, it felt like I had spent hours doing pull-ups. Amy has been kind enough to massage the knots out of my arms so I can actually use them. The other part of my body causing great discomfort was the heels of my feet. My theory is that they dragged me to the operating room by the arms while dragging my heels. Just a theory mind you, nothing on tape.

A wake up and a chuckle

In the Navy, we use to count down the days or hours and the last day was always, "...and a wake up." So, where I previously posted 96, it should probably have said 72 and a wake up. Now, there is nothing but the wake up left. This time tomorrow, I will be under the gown and wearing a smile, at least until the meds wear off...LOL

The chuckle is that this time they won't have to keep asking me if I know which boob they are cutting on. The last time, they kept asking me even AFTER I had a wire sticking out of the left one and a dixie cup taped over the wire end. Oh yeah, and 3 doctors' initials.....not that they were that obvious or anything....LOL

A very heavy sigh

Got a call this afternoon informing me that surgery for tomorrow was cancelled. No clue if or when I will be rescheduled for, but considering the radiation and chemo are on hold until after the surgery, one would think....

Down sizing (or is that one word?)

In light of recent issues concerning the economic crisis, I have decided that instead of doing "reconstruction/breast reduction" surgery, I would opt to have the girls downsized to a more economic work force level.

In addition, the fabric I will save by buying much smaller bras will provide clothing to as least one small third world country.....right???

Apparently, I am not dying

It appears that it is Stage 1, but they won't know exactly until they get in there and start cutting. They will biopsy one lymph node and then proceed from there. They do not think it is so invasive that they will be required to do a radical mastectomy, and assure me my boobs will look pretty much the same when they are done. I actually stated loudly, "WHAT?? I thought there would be a reduction as part of this whole thing." Apparently they have made such great strides they can preserve most of the breast tissue and then have me undergo radiation or chemo. I was not happy to hear that a reduction was not automatically part of the procedure.....LOL

So, after being told that the lumpectomy would be scheduled for Dec. 3 or 4 (what with next week being Thanksgiving and the fact I actually wanted to talk to the oncologist and the radiologist before having any of that done) means surgery in another 2.5 weeks. The surgeon did refer me to the plastic surgeon, who agreed that a 38GG was a bit much and that therefore, he would have no problem doing the reduction after the lumpectomy had healed. He reminded me that men liked really big breasts. I stated that there were times when too much of a good thing was just too much. After all, while a 24" penis might sound good in theory, that was simply too much. He laughed and agreed that he saw my point. When the reduction tissues healed, they would then do radiation or chemo.

Timeline = Surgery for lumpectomy on Dec. 3 or 4.
Reduction surgery 3 weeks after that.
Radiation or chemo 6 weeks after the reduction.