It's a new one!

I read somewhere that almost half, if not more, of a group of people who were polled said that this past year was by far the worst year in a long time. With unemployment rates skyrocketing, homes being foreclosed in huge numbers and the economy tanking the way it did, it is a wonder anyone who did not formerly have billions in the bank survived to tell the tale.

As we ALL know, this past year for me was a bad year, medically speaking. Technically it all began in '08, but the vast majority of my medical issues consumed 2009. With that said, I am still thankful to be alive, glad I got the girls reduced and happy to have lost a few pounds. I am not happy about the whole hair thing, but it is saving me TONS on haircare and maintenance. (Yes folks, still riding that gravy train!)

I am happy to report I am starting the new year with a new phone and a temp gig that should last at least a day or two into the new year. It is always nice to go into a new year with a pending paycheck!

The bad news, or alternatively, the other shoe, is the fact that my mother is awaiting the results of her needle biopsy. They found a small lump in her breast and she had the biopsy on Wednesday. Because of the holiday, she will not have her results until Monday, at the earliest. The good news is that neither her mammogram nor her biopsy were so clearly definitive that performing the actual lab analysis were merely part of the protocol. In my case, even I could tell from the mammo and the biopsy results that my news was bad right away. The lump was obvious to a legally blind person on the mammogram and the lab tech told me that while healthy cells are pink and float, cancer cells are white and sink. I was immediately informed that I had, "...a lot of sinkers".

I had described in detail what they do for the "needle biopsy" (NEEDLE MY ASS) and how it was more like a rotorooter. Those who read the post regarding this whole nightmare are fully aware that this was a highly disturbing thing to endure. My mother said that my recitation of the facts and issues, in addition to a graphic description of the procedure, were spot on and she actually found herself chuckling through the procedure. The lab tech said my description of the thing as a rotorooter was the best she had heard.

Let's all be thankful we pulled out of the last year in reasonably good shape and keep my mom in your thoughts and prayers. NOONE should have to go through this.

The Biopsy Part 1, the actual procedure

I chose to go to the biopsy alone and then planned to go to work afterwards. Remember, we already knew it was cancer, but this would be the defining moment when we would finally find out how bad it was. Because it was a "needle biopsy" I figured it would not be as invasive as a lumpectomy and therefore I could return to work quickly.

They actually gave me two gowns this time. One opened in the front and the top one opened in the back. They put you on a table with a huge hole in the middle and have you put the "bad" boob into the hole. Because the hole is rather large, it is like leaning over a manhole cover and the edge of the hole digs into your ribs. No matter how much I shifted, it was never going to be "comfortable" so I finally convinced them to just start the damned thing so it would be over more quickly. I refused to let them show me the needle aparatus. REALLY? Does anyone really want to see it?

The boob is then placed into a smasher that is just like the one that they use for mammograms. I was told to keep my left side still. They then hoisted me up like a car and worked on me from below. The staff was great in that they talked me through everything and let me know ahead of time what the various noises, etc. were. The outside of the breast is then numbed with novicaine, yes, just like at the dentist. The "needle" cannot be that tiny because they had to cut into me to get the thing in. Once it is in, sometime during the procedure they shoot another shot of novicaine into the hole.

The procedure is very unpleasant and very uncomfortable. I could "feel" the drilling and it was not a happy thing. My entire right side of my body was so tensed up that it still bothers me a week later. My right shoulder is the bad one and by the time the novicaine wore off at 4pm ish, I didn't know which hurt worse, the left tit or the right side of my body.